In the moment

Yesterday Cole started a medicine called Votrient (pazopanib). It’s a FDA approved drug for treating soft tissue sarcoma, and is a protein kinase inhibitor. According to a report of Phase I-III trials Pazopanib has shown “activity in advanced pretreated STS (soft tissue sarcoma). The drug is well tolerated, allowing prolonged therapy.” We hope this therapy will stop the recent increase in activity in Cole’s liver tumor and finish it off for good. We hope Cole will maintain his good health and high quality of life and suffer no side effects. But we remain in the moment and will take things as they come.

Sidenote – Today I am very thankful to be insured. The cost of Votrient is astronomical. A 90-day supply was a $65 copay for me with $10,898.34 billed to my insurance for 180 precious little pills. #costofcancer

A dear friend shared this poem that was EXACTLY what I needed in this moment…

If you can keep your head when all about you 
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, 
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too; 
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master; 
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim; 
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same; 
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone, 
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, 
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run, 
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, 
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son! 

Joseph Rudyard Kipling (30 December 1865 – 18 January 1936)

… A hopeful reminder that the universe infinitely provides…




One thought on “In the moment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s